Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Final Goodbye

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I left him a message saying I would like to talk to him.
Not so much as a text back.
I wish I could believe that he hasn't called because of some big emotional struggle within himself...
But I can't.
I've just been dismissed.
And still I want to reach out and say "darling, it's really not that serious, I just wanted to address your need to play games and tell you that even though I like you more than just a friend, I have no desire for a commitment."
But I guess it was meant to be this way.
This is final.
He's said so much without saying anything at all.

I think I lied to myself by allowing my heart to supress deeper feelings for him. Eventually those feelings could not be caged in and flooded out at a vulnerable moment.
I was not prepared.

I am, afterall, a slave to my emotions.
I know to steer clear of him from now on.

Goodbye Gino.

Sincerely Anon

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I will from now on refrain from writing about MM because I think he browses the web a lot and I would really hate for him to read this blog and recognize himself as one of the characters.
This decision of mine is partially thanks to the anonymous writer at The Courtesan Connection who recently had a post on her blog regarding anonymity.
So, for anonymity reasons, I've decided to withdraw my "Homewrecker" post. Sometimes I find it exciting to place tiny bites of real information hidden in my entry, it gives me a rush not unlike having sex in public. But it's not smart.