Tuesday, August 08, 2006


It has been over a month since things ended with Gino and my heart has stopped skipping a beat everytime I think of him. This process of letting go has been painful but I've gained a deeper understanding of myself.

I tend to put up a wall to protect myself because I'm hypersensitive in many ways. I did some independent research which reaffirmed that. All my senses are extremely sensitive.
This most recent break up shed some light on my relationships with men.
I tried to take control by fucking him out of my system.
But women tend to form emotional attachments, very much like I did.
It was inevitable. Since I was never completely over him.

Once I let someone in, it's very hard to remove them. I can even still feel their essence long after we've stopped talking. Many times I call people who say they were just about to call me. I also have the ability to take on other people's emotions. I've never shared this with anyone until last week, during an intense conversation at an ungodly hour.

I think I want to concentrate on this for a bit. Wrap my mind around it and imerge with a clearer understanding of my talents and what they're meant for.

I bought a bunch of self help books that should help me figure out a way to address and solve some of these personal issues.